Rule #9: Your Time is Not as Valuable as You Think It is

This one comes from a specific complaint about this blog.  I was going to create a FWQ  (Frequently Whined Questions) section to handle it, but instead I'll just expand on it to prove that all of society is shit and we deserve a painful, fiery end to life on this planet.

Evidently, I have ruined people's lives by keeping the content warning on this site.

Yes, I am a monster who is worse than Hitler.  Save your comments.

On the assumption that all of you have:

1. high-speed internet
2. a computer built after the turn of the century,
3. the motor skills of a squirrel with Parkinson's or better, 

this process should take you about 3.46 seconds.

Deal with it.

For those of you who are upset about it, I have one question:  "What were you going to do with that time that I have prevented?  Work on that Cancer cure?  Find a new planet?  Come up with a better, more effective cock ring?"  (Meanwhile, comments like the last one are why I keep the warning up.  Maybe someday they'll be naked breasts here.  Haven't decided yet.  I need a rule that involves naked breasts first.  I'm working on it - give me a second!)

It's not just here.  Everywhere I see people who are INCENSED at being delayed by about 3 to 5 seconds.  And, I'm assuming not all of them REALLY REALLY REALLY have to go to the bathroom right then.

The cab that races through an intersection filled with pedestrians just to slam on the brakes 5 feet later at the next red light.  The guy who is pissed that the elevator he got on doesn't go to the 5th floor (even though it says Floors 9-18 right there above the door) who looks at everyone else in the car like it's their fault.  The woman who empties the dryer filled with your clothes without waiting at least two minutes to see if you are coming to get them.*

*I had a weird variation of this earlier this year.  I came down to get my laundry, and found that my whites still had about 34 minutes to go (they should have been finished).  When I opened the dryer to see if it was indeed mine, I saw my clothes, along with some underwear and towels belonging to someone else.  Apparently someone opened my dryer, shoved her (judging by the underwear) stuff in there, and then added time to the dryer.  So, I did what seemed right.  I opened the dryer, took out my clothes, and left hers.  You know, I think I forgot to close it again and restart it.  Oops.

I had the joy Saturday night of seeing two bridge and tunnel girls at Penn Station, perched on 5" heels with a micron thick points, decide that the taxi line was for "little people" and snare a cab right in front of the line.  Again, I'm assuming they were not late for an appearance at the UN Conference on Nuclear Disarmament.  More likely, they were being whisked to the meatpacking district so they can try and cut the line at The Blitzkrieger. 

OMG, this is like worse than Herpes!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyone who's met me will tell you I am not Mr. Laissez-Faire.  Especially when the Yankees/Jets/Devils/Nets (until they move)/Hoosiers/Seton Hall Pirates are playing.  But this is insane.  Nothing, NOTHING, you are doing cannot wait the seconds it takes to let someone in front of you at the Lincoln Tunnel, to actually pedal the block to the avenue that's heading the way you want to go, or frankly to get the next train back to your suburb.

I'm sorry, you're just not THAT important.  If it makes you feel any better, neither am I.

Of course, much of what I'm saying here was said much better by Louis CK...